Gík (กิ๊ก) = "fucking friend" - the literal translation
So a person you have intimate relations with but not a girlfriend or boyfriend. Essentially the Thai version of Fuck Buddy
I am so bored; I am going to find a Gik and spend some time with them.
After you've been in Thailand for a while, you'll eventually stumble across mention of the term 'Gik'.
It seems both men and women are allowed to maintain their own Gik. Once they have 1, it's only a matter of time until they'll add more. Sometimes many more.
So what exactly is a Gik in Thailand?
The literal translation of a Gík (กิ๊ก) in Thailand is a friend for sex. Giks are Thai women wanting friends for sex or a second Thai wife known as a 'mia noi' or freelancers/prostitutes.
'Have your cake, eat it too and have a cream bun on the side'.
Relationships in Thailand run at different levels.
Gík (กิ๊ก) means mistress or "a friend for sex". Faen (แฟน) = girlfriend, boyfriend
I'll get the easy one out of the way first.
Faen - if you're serious about a Thai girl, you will want her to be your Faen, your girlfriend.
If she's interested, then that's great. There might be a problem, though. She might already be in a relationship with another guy but is still interested in being with you too.
Don't knock until you've tried it!
She will want YOU to be her Gik - she wants to keep her boyfriend, and she wants you on-the-side.
You're about to enter into the world of Thai fuck-buddies. A place mentioned only in whispers. Giks have been going on for centuries, and it commonplace.
It is essential to understand the three main Gik varieties. This knowledge will better equip you in your next steps and how you go about them.
A gik is more than 'friends with benefits'.
Having a Gik on the side can lead to jealously, anger and a break-up with your Thai girlfriend. Thai women are notorious jealous. They feel betrayal quickly. Think that through beforehand.
From a man's perspective, though, a Gik is similar to a girlfriend but without emotional attachments.
You will be required to spend time with her in much the same way as your girlfriend.
Giks will expect to go to the movies, have dinner with you and she already knows regular sex is involved. She isn't paying for any of these activities either.
Be prepared for money to be exchanged with any women you have on the side. It is common practice to pay a gik a monthly income/retainer. Think of this retainer as a long-term rental payment. The amount needs to be determined and agreed upon before you start.
Having a second wife is normal outside Western countries.
In Thailand, a 'mia noi' or 'minor wife' is usually reserved for wealthier men.
She is emotionally attached. Your mia noi will be spending half or more of your time, together with you. You'll be living with her in one house and your 1st wife or 'mia luang' (real wife) in another residence.
Why is a 'mia noi' for the wealthy?
Your financial burdens include having children with your minor and your real wife. There are partnerships involved in real estate ownership with both plus all the associated costs for child-raising, food, clothing, medical, entertainment etc.
A second wife should not be entered into lightly.
All women react to this scenario differently. Most times, her reaction will depend on your wealth plus what benefits she is getting from you.
It can lead to a divorce with the primary wife if she isn't happy with her arrangement - another costly drawn-out exercise.
Many ex-pats in Thailand employ freelancers.
They'll eventually settle on a number of their favourite girls who they will see regularly.
Strangely, in Thailand, many people don't see engaging with freelancers as cheating. It does depend on who you ask, though.
Securing a gik relationship will take time and patience for many.
Living in Thailand or at least regular visits are ideal.
The most effortless gik connection comes from straight rental - try multiple freelancers. Girls who do in-home massage are in this same category. Both are worth the investment.
Maintain a running list.
Develop friendly, easy-going relationships with the ones you find personally appealing. For the first few encounters, get your servicing done, sit down afterwards and slowly get to know the freelancer.
Don't be pushy. Keep it professional. Most of these Thai girls are wary of foreigners trying to get them for nothing.
It's a hard way to make a living for them.
These girls have enormous competition, both in freelancing and in-home massage services. After several visits to your condo, you can broach the subject of a rate cut or you both might like to be more than friends.
When a Thai girl develops any sort of connection through conversation, she counts you as a friend. Strange and true.
Many guys who live in Thailand have freelancer friends. Out of the blue, these men will get a Line message from a prostitute he knows. Because they are friends, she'll be asking for a place to crash for the night because she's in the area and tired.
Saying 'Yes' gets you a fuck-buddy for the night and breakfast with a sexy Thai girl in the morning.
You'll have an infrequent Freelancer Gik
The easiest way to find day-to-day Giks is to look for a regular Thai girlfriend. The process is the same.
Online dating is the smoothest path - less hassle 24x7. Go your own pace and style.
Some foreigners prefer the bar and club scene. Going this route will see you only attracting freelancer and Thai bargirls Giks. There is nothing wrong there either if that's your taste.
But why not 'kill two birds with one stone'?
Some Thai girls are more than happy to consider a Thai girlfriend relation and be a Gik. Both will be found on dating sites.
Read many online profile descriptions from Thai women. A substantial percentage mention they're looking for 'friendship'.
Meet them as a friend. Have a coffee or ice-cream and get to know her.
Don't push for anything. Relax and enjoy the time together. Show the girl respect the first few times and then fuck her. You know she isn't Gik-material if she refuses sex with you on the 3rd meetup.
Move on to your next candidate. Don't waste your time on non-starters.
Maintaining your facade of 'friendship first' allows you to set the pace, not her.
You'll develop your harem before too long lol - many ex-pats prefer this loose form of relationship. They provide friendship, pay for food and movies, and everyone enjoys the experience.
The same warning applies to Giks as it does to Western 'fuck buddies'. At some stage, one of you will want to step up into a real girlfriend/boyfriend relationship.
Emotional attachment develops when two people share time and intimacy over a long period.
You'll both want it or one of you won't. That's the moment you no longer have a Gik.
There's a unique Gik variation on the norm.
University is expensive in Thailand. 75% of Thai girls eventually struggle to maintain fee payment. It's that common.
A struggling Thai University girl doesn't have many options. She's studying hard to get somewhere in life. Working cuts into her tertiary time.
She'll have heard all the stories of what other girls do. Use the power of the pussy.
Young University girls will openly invite you to sponsor them. They need the money and if you want them writhing on you naked then 'make a deal' with her.
Transactions commonly range from tuition fee payments to that plus accommodation. That is the girl's side of the arrangement.
You need to agree, with her, on the visitation frequency for sex.
Just an FYI - you will certainly not be the sole provider to her either. Once she gets a taste for the arrangement, it's natural to 'up the ante'.
If you're considering a second 'mia noi' wife, weigh up the potential impact to your finances first.
Are you going to keep your second wife a secret? Or are you going to tell your first wife about your proposal? Pros and Cons to both decisions.
You'll use your traditional methods to find a mia noi - we have many men who are fishing the online dating pond here. They are upfront with the type of Thai woman they want.
People will accept your Mia Noi in Thailand.
But you'll need to be well funded to pull it off.
Any good idea will have downsides.
Having a fuck buddy appeals to all men, especially in Thailand with it's the abundance of pretty sweet Thai girls.
At their core, women in Thailand have a naturally sweet personality, generally.
They literally wouldn't hurt a fly.
If you are cheating on a current girlfriend, get ready for some pain.
Being discovered having a secret Gik, your girlfriend's mood will undoubtedly change.
Having secrets has its downsides. Most girlfriends will not be accepting of you entertaining a Gik on the side. They don't like sharing your cock with any woman.
Choose to walk away from your girlfriend or patch it up with endless promises never to have a Gik again. You are better with the first choice. She will never trust you again, and you'll have a life of endless pain.
Long term friendships always lead to emotional attachment. That's how human nature works.
At some point, you or your gik will want more than movies and fucking.
Prepare for that situation, a new girlfriend or a gik break-up.
Continual reinforcement of the Gik Rules is better. Restate your plan from the beginning, so you minimise problems.
If you're intending on having only Giks, it's going to get confusing at times.
You need to do detailed note-taking. Get a multi-person ovulation calendar for your phone plus a spreadsheet to keep track of each Gik's individual preferences.
Getting these sorted first will save embarrassing moments, in the future.
Never think a gik or two will be cheap.
Having one woman is challenging to maintain. Having more adds to your current financial burdens.
And Thai girls think all foreigners are wealthy. Certainly far more abundant than they are. Many will take advantage of this.
Providing the rewards are there for you, rock on, my man!
Most men already find one women's emotions demanding.
Second and more wives amplify your burdens.
I prefer a simpler lifestyle. Bear in mind, in Thailand at least, more than one wife is viewed as a status symbol too.
More wives mean more emotional outbursts, jealousy flare-ups, potentially more children to raise & control plus the expenses.
You're a brave man indeed taking on a 'mia noi' or two.
I went through a phase when I wasn't looking for a regular Thai girlfriend. Work was busy. I was comfortable with freelancers and a conventional good in-room massage.
I had a favourite massage girl. She was a licensed professional masseuse and was good at her work.
One day she asked if she could ask me a question. Sure, what is it?
She wanted to practice giving me a blowjob after my massage. All her friends made extra money with farang, and she wanted to see if she could earn extra too. She was not sure she had excellent blowjob skills.
I refused, at first. I said I preferred only a good massage. Maybe another time might be better, I replied.
So refusal but leaving the door open was my gambit here.
We got to chatting during my next massage. The massage girl mentioned the blowjob situation again. She was lightly brushing past my cock at this point. Well, OK, let's try if you would like, I said.
Here I found myself with a nice Thai massage lady begging to practice giving me blowjobs, regularly.
I always gave her a good tip plus was able to train her in how I preferred it done.
With the current COVID virus outbreak around the world, a Thai family was in quarantine.
Nothing unusual with that, on the surface.
But the husband had a few giks, and so did the wife.
After tracking was complete, over 100 other people also had to be placed into quarantine.
Giks in Thailand is commonplace. It seems everyone is doing it.
Why don't you?
When you have a Thai girl as a friend, she's a friend forever. That's entirely true.
Thai girls don't have many friends. They want to hold onto them, as best as they are able.
Another ex-pat friend, Steve, had a casual relationship with a Thai girl.
He had great sex with her, but it was a casual thing. They were just friend who'd meet up for a good time together; he always maintained the respect of her and they were friends.
Well, she eventually found and married another visiting foreigner, and she moved to Germany.
Thai people always need to return to Thailand to visit family and friends.
When this Thai girl did fly back to Thailand, the first thing she did was call Steve. She needed to vent some emotional baggage about her husband and needed a friendly ear.
As it turns out, she also wanted to fuck Steve again too.
That's the process with bored Thai girls. If they need some cock action, many girls still retain 'old flames' who are more than willing to service them at a moment's notice.
A good ex-pat friend, Gerry, loved chatting with freelancers and professional sex workers.
He just loved to hear their stories plus the antics they got up too with visiting foreigners.
Once you have one freelancer friend, you get more. Other girls readily see you are trustworthy and want to join in.
He soon found himself as the ''go-to guy' when these professional girls needed a place to stay or a friendly ear to listen to them, in times of need.
What was the upside?
They'd stay over at his condo. He ended up with a bounty of skilled fuck time - no cost, other than an enjoyable breakfast in the morning with attractive Thai girls.
Gik relationships aren't for every guy.
Many of you will be more than content with a monogamous relationship filled with the pleasures a Thai woman will be happy to bestow upon you.
If you are looking to extra-curricular sex, Thailand is the Land of Smiles and the Land of Adultery.
What is a Thai Gik?
Is there any downsides to having a Gik?
Author: Martin Cooney
Enjoying Life in Asia/Pacific
Hi, my name is Martin. I have many friends in and traveled throughout the Asia/Pacific regions for the past 17 years. I am passionate in helping others with my insight and past adventures.
I hope you enjoy the stories I write and take a little something away from them. I've contributed to over 160 posts on travel, dating, marriage and relationships.