Thai Romances

The 10 Deadly Sins When Dating a Thai Woman

Martin Cooney
September 22, 2020 • 20 min read • Click for comments
Updated: November 02, 2021
halloween party thai woman

Finding the right Thai woman is more about where to find her, your attitudes, and the demeanor you embrace.

What areas should a foreign man be aware of when looking for a Thai girlfriend or wife?

The people of Thailand are respectful, peaceful, and calm, mainly due to their long-term Buddhist religion. The ten main areas all foreigners must know are:-

  • Be clean and tidy
  • Don't make promises to a Thai woman that you can't keep
  • Don’t pressure a Thai woman for sex
  • Avoid disrespecting Thai culture and traditions
  • Avoid talking about Thai politics and The Monarchy
  • Don't be rude and obnoxious
  • Dating websites offer economics of scale and better variety
  • Always focus on the Thai woman you're accompanying
  • Avoid negative remarks concerning Thailand
  • Be careful of your language tone and avoid swearing

Knowing what to do (and what not to do) is critical for an easy-flowing dating experience.

I know, trust me. When I first arrived in Thailand, I discovered a different paradigm concerning Thai women; they aren't like Western ladies.

Different cultures and traditions impact on how a Thai woman perceives you as a good or bad guy. And you want her to feel you're the best guy imaginable.

Use Dating Sites & Not Bars or Clubs

It would be best if you focused on getting the outcome you're looking for; you want to find a Thai girl who fits your requirements.

Finding the 'right Thai woman' means you must start with the most significant opportunities to find the best girls for yourself.

I looked at this starting point more than seven years ago.

Tackling the 'pick-up methods' in bars and clubs wasn't going to cut it for me, I'm afraid.

Why I hear you ask?

I know you probably think you can walk into a bar and choose any Thai girl you desire. That's partly true, for sure.

Partly true because you're only getting a limited selection of women who will all be bar girls; women interested in your money in exchange for sexual gratification.

If you are only interested in 'Bar Girl Sex,' the bars or clubs is your solution.

For those looking for sexual gratification AND a Thai girlfriend or wife, forget the bar scene.

Thai Girls on Dating SiteThai Bars Girls in Bars & Clubs
Contacted over 600 Thai girls in 6 months
Dated 300 Thai girls in 6 months300 Bar Girls (used as this example)
Cost$45.86 (6 months paid membership)- 2 local beers 160 baht each
- 1 ‘Lady Drink’ 200 baht
- $US5,000.00 (156,000 baht) TOTAL
SexFree $0.00Paid
– 2000 baht inc Bar Fine & room rental
- $US19,000 (600,000 baht) TOTAL
Total cost for 300 Thai women$45.86$US24,000.00

A dating site offers exceptional value for money, and the Thai women will not be the typical bar girl whore.

The normal Thai women you'll meet on a dating website offer variety, and you'll get far more in the sex department; for a low cost of ZERO.

A Thai bar girl
You will be paying for her over and over, every time.

Be Clean and Tidy

Everything warms up in Thailand with the country's tropical heat. Most Thai people have sensitive noses to detect if anything has gone 'off.'

How does this peculiar nasal quirk affect you dating in Thailand?

Thai girls smell everything; food, drinks, themselves, and also you.

First impressions count for everything.

Arriving to meet a woman with you smelling of body odor is a sure-fire way to end that first date before it has time to blossom.

You only have to see how Thai men arrive to meet a woman. They're clean-shaven, smell good, hair is tidy and groomed, and Thai men always dress for a successful outcome - which is to take that Thai girl back home with him.

'When in Thailand, do as the Thais do.'

Prepare yourself before you step out of your condo. Get freshly showered, use deodorant, take breath fresheners with you, wear smart casual, light clothes, and get in 'the zone.'

Don't Make Promises You Can't Keep

If there's one thing Thai ladies hate, it's people who lie.

Many women mention their hatred of lying in their profile descriptions.


Thai people live a relaxed and easy-going existence.

When it comes to time and appointments, Thai women are notorious for running late or forgetting altogether. Their lack of awareness will be one of your main frustrations. But that doesn't allow you to run late.

Your goal is to make a great impression, so she's willing to go to the next step.

If you promise to meet her, you arrive on time; otherwise, she'll think you're a playboy meeting with another Thai woman.

Pro Tip:-

The better method is to confirm before the time that she has remembered your dating appointment, and you leave to meet her only when she has left her room.

Money & Support

Thai people are relatively impoverished compared to your financial outlook. Money is always discussed between Thais as they're still cash-strapped.

But you keep your financial affairs to yourself.

Discuss money in broad terms such as your job or where you derive your cash. Divulging how much you earn or your bank balance is a definite no-no.

Since any Thai girlfriend won't know about your money situation, it allows you to deflect any promises to support her financially. Every Thai woman will be looking to you as a 'financial white-knight.'

You must dilute a Thai girl's financial expectations at every turn but still keep her on the hook as her best prospect.

A Thai bikini girl
No need to pressure. She will give it up.

Don’t Pressure Her For Sex.

Women in Thailand recognize they need to give up their goods to men. They aren't dumb as you think they are. You'll score more pussy in Thailand than you ever will back in your home country.

Never pressure a Thai woman to come back to your condo for sex; you'll place unnecessary stress on her.

If you're a visiting tourist, you should target bar girls or Thai women who want to play the holiday girlfriend scenario. These Thai girls give you the best' bang for your buck' on a short-term holiday time frame.

When you play the game with a degree of disinterest, you'll discover that the Thai girl will be itching to go to your condo. She will want to see what you might be hiding and secure her place as your girlfriend.

No pressure sex - play it chill.

Respect If She Can’t Come Back to Your Place

Not coming to your condo is merely a delaying tactic on the Thai girl's side.

Thai women have social and traditional pressures; to not be seen as a slut or whore. Allow her some grace to feel OK.

You should also have a rule on how long you're willing to wait for her pay-out. You don't want to end up in the friend-zone and just be her meal ticket.

It is a standard foreigner rule to start sexual adventures after the second or third meeting. I prefer to 'play it by ear' and feel if I like to girl first.

If you hear any words, 'she wants to be just friends,' end it with her and move to your next Thai girl prospect.

The Subject Of Sex

Foreign men flock to Thai women for a good reason.

These girls don't have hang-ups with sex like a Western woman. For a Thai girl, sex is natural and an expected duty they must perform if they hope to keep a boyfriend, foreign or otherwise.

Many Thai girls are inexperienced, but they are very open to being trained in what you like, sex-wise.

Every Thai girlfriend has mentioned I should tell her how and what I like to do; she'll try her best to satisfy me.

I've never had that with a Western woman; in fact, quite the opposite.

Keep Your Eyes Focussed On Her

Thailand is chock-full of Thai cuties, normal girls, bar-girls, models, freelancers, and Thai girls in their ultra-short work skirts.

Most men get neck-strain when first coming to Thailand. Your head is always moving to catch sight of the abundance of girls.

Don't ever get caught eyeing other girls when you're out on a date with one, though.

Thai women are incredibly jealous and possessive when it comes to their boyfriends.

Here is what you will experience when caught:-

  • anger
  • loss of interest in you
  • arguments
  • playboy accusations
  • all of the above

Keep your attention and eyeballs focussed on the girl with you. You want her attention, don't you?

4 Thai girls having a drink
Keep your eyes on your date. No looking at these Thai girls, OK?

Avoid Bashing Country and Culture

Every country has it's ups and downs. Yours and Thailand.

Thai girls are patriotic and proud of their country.

Avoid bashing about how your country is better than her country. It's common to make comparisons, but foreigners continue to be guilty of Thailand-bashing.

The same goes for making jokes about other people you see in Thailand. You'll experience a vast array of people in Thailand; outrageous ladyboys, unkempt street vendors, plastic surgery endowed Thai women, etc. Keep your snide jokes to yourself; women in Thailand are more accepting of others than you are.

Ask Her Questions about the Thai Culture

Instead of bashing her country, ask questions about her culture and traditions.

  • What are her preferred foods?
  • Where in Thailand has she traveled?
    • Which places has she enjoyed most of all (and why)?
  • Has she been to any other countries?
  • Does she like ethnic cuisine?

You'll get extra respect from her for showing interest. Plus, you'll know more about her, what she prefers, and where she's been. These areas are all great conversation starters to keep your time with her, alive and percolating.

Cultural Differences - What Are They?

You will be in for some significant cultural changes when visiting Thailand for your first time.

  • The Thai language is one of the toughest in the world to learn
  • The food in Thailand - hot, spicy, and healthy
  • Saving face - take extra care to never insult or cause shame to another Thai person
  • Female bathroom attendants while you urinate - kind of off-putting the first time, lol
  • Buddhism plays a significant role in Thai life
  • Royalty is crazy important - take extra care never to speak ill of the Thai Royal family
  • Feet are considered dirty in Thai culture
  • Leave your footwear outside, which is a common custom in Asian countries
  • Ladyboys. Get ready to be inundated by gorgeous sexy kathoeys
  • Street dogs wandering about everywhere. Nice to see the level of care and acceptance by the Thai people
  • Don't drink the tap water

Enjoy the change. The above points are a few exciting (and unique) experiences you can discuss with any new Thai girlfriend. Embrace change.

Change your outlook to acceptance of new things - Don't be a whinger.

Don't Be a CheapSkate.

Nothing belittles a Thai woman more than a guy unwilling to comprehend the proper respect for pricing.

I'm always amazed at how cheap some men can be.

Everything in Thailand is 50% (or more) cheaper than in your home country.

Pay For Things

Never expect a Thai woman to contribute anything when she's with you.

A Thai woman paying is incredibly bad form. She's the person struggling to make ends meet. You're the person searching for the right woman as either a Thai girlfriend and wife; and wanting to get into her pants.

You pay for the meals, movie tickets, desserts, taxi fares, holidays, plane tickets, and other expenses.

She will want to contribute small portions to feel like a partnership. If she wants to buy some fruit to share, let her do that.

Pro Tip:-

Avoid expensive dinner venues even when she insists. You must take the lead where and what you prefer to eat - whether it's a new Thai dish from a street vendor or a mid-range restaurant.

Never be bullied by a Thai woman for exorbitant food; she is merely testing the water with you.

4 Thai girls having a drink
Keep your eyes on your date. No looking at these Thai girls, OK?

Tipping Sends The Right Signals

A few baht goes a long way in Thailand.

Whether you're a generous guy or not, giving a tip sends the right signals to a Thai woman. Leaving a tip to service staff demonstrates to your girlfriend, you are willing to share your wealth with others less fortunate than you.

As of the time of writing, $US1 equals 31 baht. A small tip doesn't affect you but is enough for a meal in Thailand.

Examples of casual tipping:-

  • If you have some market food, order a coke at 17 baht. Pay with a 20 baht note and tell the vendor to keep the change. Market vendors rarely get a tip; he'll be smiling at even 3 baht extra.
  • Throw the loose coins in the Tip Box near the register after you've paid the bill. I usually add a 20 baht note.
  • The same applies to taxi fares. Round up your taxi charge and throw in an extra 10 - 20 baht.

Acknowledge and reward good service in Thailand. Your Thai girl will notice these small gestures.

A word of warning - Thailand isn't Bali. For goodness sake, please don't haggle for discounts on everything. The barter system is uncommon in Thailand.

If your girl mentions an item is more expensive than she thought normal, you can make a cheaper realistic counter-offer. Make your offer once and if it is not accepted, move on.

Watch Your Language

The Thai language is a challenge, but so is English.

You'll have continuous clashes with language:-

  • Your girlfriend will have low English language skills.
    • She'll have a limited understanding of your sentences; keep what you say as simplistic as possible.
    • However, she will be eager to learn more, so encourage her.
  • Your Thai language skills will be near-zero.

Your Vocal Tone

Walk around anywhere in Thailand, and you'll notice an indefinable serenity.

Thai people conduct themselves in a composed and relaxed manner. It is rare to see a display of hostility or public anger.

As a foreigner, maintaining your composer is crucial. Maintain your vocal tone to a passive level. Thai women especially are sensitive to male hostility - raising your voice signals you as potentially harmful and a threat to her wellbeing.

Your Thai girlfriend will respect your wishes and take your lead. Simply saying any of the following will be sufficient to get your point across:-

  • "No"
  • "Mai krub."
  • "Not want."
  • "We do another is better."


In every dating situation, swearing and using crass words is a big No-No. Men swearing is perceived poorly by Thai women.

Most Thais understand the word 'fuck' and other commonly used English swear words.

You want to convey an air of respect and positive energy to a new Thai girl. Your ultimate goal will be a pleasant short or long term relationship. She must want to accompany you.

Avoid preliminary problems eases the path to getting the girl.

Avoid Politics & The Monarchy

Thailand is a country that struggles with political stability and has been for centuries.

Since 1996. Thailand last had a positive political index in 2002 - according to

There have been many causes, including military coups, corruption, and the 'old guard' mentality. You never know which political power a Thai person supports.

Foreigners should never engage in any sort of political talk with Thai people. An innocent comment can lead to heated conversations or worse.

The 2019/2020 landscape is developing to a worse political climate for Thailand. 2014 saw a military coup d 'état lead by General Prayut Chan-o-cha, who is now Prime Minister Prayut Chan-o-cha since 2019.

Thailand has so far had seventeen Constitutions.

September 2020 has seen a rise of everyday Thai people objecting to the current leading democratic party and strong objections to the power of the Thai King. There are strict laws against negative sentiment towards any Thai Royal.

Suffice to say, foreigners should steer well clear from debating Thai politics and the Royal family. You're just asking for trouble.

Find conversation starters that don't concern politics or the Royal Family.

Rude and Obnoxious

Traveling abroad brings out lousy behavior with some men.

Thai people don't like loud, rude, or impolite personalities.

Anger scares the Thai people. The expression of intense negative emotions is a sign of having a lack of control.

You have only to wander through foreign-centric areas in Thailand to witness first-hand poor behavior of tourists.

You can witness this rudeness in Pattaya, Koh Samui, Phuket, Bangkok, or other areas with many foreigners. Disrespect and disregard of Thai culture and traditions are everywhere.

It isn't only young drunk men either. Thai newspapers love to publish incidents of young Western women skinny-dipping or desecrating sacred Thai temples.

Don't be one of the 'bad tourists.'

Jumping The Queue

You'll notice Thai people are exceptionally patient people.

It is easy to bully people in Thailand due to their reserved nature.

With the rise in Chinese tourists (with package tours) comes a surge in queue jumping.

I see this all the time in Thailand now, sadly. Even waiting for a shuttle bus, the Chinese have a nasty habit of pushing their way to the front of the waiting line.

My Thai girlfriend hates queue-jumping as do all her friends.

Leave Male Bravado At The Door

There is no need to display your testosterone-fuelled emotions in Thailand.

There is a good reason why so many Thai people practice meditation; to retain their composure to live a peaceful lifestyle.

Western countries are awash with men fighting to 'climb the challenging ladder to success' using aggression and hostility.

Thai people have rewarded advancement through long-term hard work and peaceful servitude. The culture in Thailand is remarkably different. Hostility will scare your Thai girlfriend/wife.

You only need to keep your chill to find your place here.

A slim Thai woman playing with her black hair
Do the right things and enjoy a beautiful Thai woman.


Modifying your outlook and conduct concerning Thai women is relatively easy once you understand the sticking points.

The rewards back to you will be significant; fewer objections, a more peaceful relationship, and acceptance of your quirks.

Join up today for free and see how easy it is to get started.


Where can I find a good Thai girlfriend?

  • Good Thai women don't usually frequent a bar.
  • I recommend dating sites as more cost-effective.
  • Shopping malls are popular places if you know 'day game.'
  • Clubs are good however are also popular with finding freelancers.

Which foreign tourists have the worst reputation in Thailand?

  • Chinese have a low reputation in 2019/2020.
  • Young British holiday-makers have a reputation for loud, drunken, and obnoxious behavior.
  • Thai people dislike Indians as they have a reputation for being cheapskates.
  • Russians in many main tourist areas for strong-arm tactics.

Last updated: November 02, 2021

Martin enjoys Asian food, cute Asian girls and travel in South East Asia.
Martin Cooney
Enjoying Life in Asia/Pacific

Hi, my name is Martin. I have many friends in and traveled throughout the Asia/Pacific regions for the past 17 years. I am passionate in helping others with my insight and past adventures.

I hope you enjoy the stories I write and take a little something away from them. I've contributed to over 160 posts on travel, dating, marriage and relationships.